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My mother has Alzheimer's. I've been taking care of her for four years now. Sometimes I resent who she has become and it's hard to be patient. I want HER back.

My mother has Alzheimer's. I've been taking care of her for four years now. Sometimes I resent who she has become and it's hard to be patient. I want HER back.

 
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Category: Secrets

 
Look into what aluminum does to our bodies. Let's not walk the same road. Bless you for taking care of your mother, she loves you for it. I love you for it.
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My mother took care of her mother for 10 years while she battled Alzheimer's. I feel for you.
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I completely understand your frustration. When my mom was battling brain cancer I felt so angry and helpless. I hated how she became then I learned it's part of the grieving process. Doesn't change anything but makes you feel less horrible inside. God bless you!
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You a very special person to take care of a loved one with Alzheimer's. Please, make time for yourself and seek outside help on occasion. You mother cannot help who she has bcome, but know she loves you dearly. May you be blessed.
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Don't beat yourself up. I took care of my mother-in-law for a few short weeks. It is extremely hard to take care of an Alzheimer's person.God bless all those who do.
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talk to your local county services department and ask if she qualifies for respit care.....sometimes all you need is the weekend off to recharge! i know it's hard (from experience) but there are programs available to help with long term care and the more support you have the better you will feel about the whole thing. it's not your fault you are frustrated, it's natural!
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Nice kitty.
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i know how you feel. i took care of my grandfather for 5 yrs and saidly i cant even bring myself to visit him in the bording home. He is not the person he once was either and it hurts me.
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I cannot even imagine how heartbreaking it must be to see your mom change like this. When I lost my mom (a social worker who worked with dementia patients) in 2008, the only comfort I had was knowing that her worst fear, that she herself would one day suffer, would never come true. I agree with ^5... you are a EXTRAORDINARY person for having the strength to continue to see her under the circumstances.
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I hope in the next life she is made whole again.
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I know EXACTLY how you feel. My mom had breast cancer and now that she is all better she is TOTALLY different. Its like she got another chance at life and she wants to use that time to be evil and a horrid person. She was my best friend and now shes gone forever. I always said if she died i would kill myself before live without her. People say "you should be HAPPY she is still alive!" But in my eyes she didnt live through it.
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^Maybe you'll get it too. Maybe, only THEN will you understand what it's like.
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You will be a stronger person for your labors. Stay strong.
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I hear you.
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Thank you for doing it. Thank you.
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Don't you hope it's hereditary?
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It saddens me when mommies leave parental controls off and the kids write ignorant rubbish. Regardless, you are awesome for being there and trying to understand her. I wish you some peace from that fact alone.
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2^ You're a heartless piece of shit. You should be ashamed of yourself. I watched my grandmother go through this for about 4 years before she passed and it is very hard to watch a loved one go through the disease. You should be proud of yourself for what you are doing for her. As stated a few up, ASK for help so you can just go and relax for awhile. Go out with friends for drinks and dancing or something you enjoy and let your mind free for a few hours. Bless you and remember her as she was.
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^Is your Mom next in line, then you?
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Thank you all for the encouragement. I get angry with myself because I always feel like I'm not doing enough, and because I have to work so hard to keep my temper in check sometimes. I know she can't help who she is, what she does, how bad her memory has become. I see her, and I want her to be the vibrant, intelligent, witty mother that raised me, and it hurts _so bad_ to see her now. But it's "stiff upper lip" and clench jaw and all that. But, to those who understand, thank you. I don't want to be thought extraordinary, I'm not - that I'm posting here is proof. I just had to scream; thank you for hearing.
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I am sorry:( My boyfriends dad had it and it was really hard to see him not be who he was...i shallsend you some happy vibes.......
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You may not think that you're extraordinary, but I work in a long term care facility and have to work closely with Dementia patients, it is difficult and many of these people don't have family that comes to even visit, let alone take care of them. So, you truly are amazing, even if she can't say it to you.
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Perhaps you could try some support groups? I don't think she's coming back. Just think about the wonderful life that she has had. This is such a horrible disease. I wish you luck, but if you're a Christian, remember, prayers are always answered.
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I thought I would put an epilogue on this - my mother died unexpectedly 11 May. I am still reeling from the shock, but am also relieved that she did not have to suffer through the final stages of Alzheimer's, where the individual is curled up in a foetal position and totally unaware of themselves or their environment. Thank you, those who gave me support, and God bless you.
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I have a friend from school who is in his late fifties and he has early onset alzheimer's. Goes to the supermarket and gets lost, he doesn't remember peoples names, etc. He and his GF have been together since they were twenty. But since they're not married, she has no legal rights as far as his treatment or their property are concerned. It's very sad and he could live for a long long time too...Good luck to you, and G-d bless for standing by your mom.
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